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Max Here with another…..

So here’s the way it works, at least so as I am learning…. My mind…. my damn mind, has been taught to focus on too much negative. This weekend at the club, I have had some emotional setbacks that make it nearly impossible to keep the mindset, the “happy state” needed. The good part about where I am mentally now, is that I at least now notice it. But where I need to be is not where I am now, where I need to be next is for me to see it (the negativity) coming and find ways to either stop it dead in its tracks or find a way to divert my inner mind from running down that negative emotional road. I’m in my late 40s and haven’t yet achieved nearly half of what I expect out of my capabilities. So I better get a jump on it.

They say that things compound. And if that’s so, then maybe that’s why I have such a deep root of defaulting my brain to see negative emotions. 40 plus years…. not good. But here is what I just did…. that’s me looking at it the wrong way. That’s me looking at it thru the wrong window. At least for me the way I should look at it is by thinking……..

The more that I can stay positive, focused forward, is how I can start compounding these positive vibes. It’s how I can start seeing the crack of hope when every thing is dark. It’s me actually drilling thru the muck of life and hitting oil. At this exact moment I am not smiling. but I am also not super sad. Earlier was a different story. But now at this moment I have been able to shift…….. pivot.

Funny thing is that now after several years I have read numerous ways to kick the funk of bad mood, but I have yet to truly apply every concept. I know I am going to get better at things. But the road is long and the time to get there is short. I am someone that likes speed and adrenaline and at some point, sooner than later I will find the way to warp time in my favor.

You know I just thought of something, what I need to do is to start writing at the moments of when I feel happiness. This initially will be difficult. I say this because as I write about doing this “happy writing”, I can feel my inner self feeling scared, fear of doing it. Why? I’m not sure.  Maybe I don’t want people to know when I’m happy? Maybe I haven’t told myself enough that I deserve to be happy. Hmmmm interesting…. This will need to be analyzed more. But somewhere in these blogs I will start writing when I am happy.

Bet!

Max.